We're going to take a day off from relationship drama to examine yet another one of Bridget's Amazing Future Inventions, right up there with Airport hugs and Saltwater Princess, the novel, only it would have to be in encyclopedia form because it's too huge now to reduce down, boiling it into something anyone could even read. Whatever. Onward and upward, right, Jake?
Remember the airport one? (Gawd. Don't go read the post. Here's the part you want)
So here's what I propose:
We divide the Internet into genres, kind of like music except the subgenreing would be LEGIT and not fucked up, in that I mean no one in their right fucking mind would label Ghost the band as anything less that pretentious theatrical pop music and everyone would agree with it, wholeheartedly and I would stop having to read about the band on all my metal news sites.
Yeah, I'm fairly picky about my metal subgenres for someone who's been listening to Lana Del Rey all week long. I'm aware. But this isn't about that.
Let's have an Internet where you pick your genre and the only thing you can see/watch/read are things that pertain to that specific genre.
Cute dogs.
Politics.
Sugar.
Hardcore porn.
Demotivational memes.
And so on, etc. Because I get tired of going looking for porn and finding politics. I get sick of finding a batch of cute puppy videos sandwiched between posts debating whether or not the poster is an asshole and food blogs. I don't want to watch a Lana Del Rey video and find Chinese propaganda social credit score stuff in my sidebar.
I don't want to see your world. Don't want the current events. Don't want to mistakenly stumble across a video of protesters getting gassed and don't want anything about Ghost in my fucking universe.
And yes, women look at porn online too. YES EVEN WITH A HOUSEFUL OF MEN.
(Honestly I'm just trying to find better/different positions for the size differences between me and them. Shut the fuck up.)
Remember the airport one? (Gawd. Don't go read the post. Here's the part you want)
What if when you traveled or were on your own in a strange place there would be a way to get comfort on the run? I had a vision of a special room or area at the airport, with yellow lights above a stark white hallway, and if you needed someone or wanted comfort you would go stand under those lights and anyone who saw you there would approach you and invite you to have a meal with them, share a cab, or simply give you a long hug. I realize that's an impossibility, a horribly invasive and assumptive series of events but at the same time if you have ever navigated an airport alone and felt as what was on the inside of your own skin brought the only familiarity in an alien sea of people then you'd probably agree this would be a splendid invention.
So here's what I propose:
We divide the Internet into genres, kind of like music except the subgenreing would be LEGIT and not fucked up, in that I mean no one in their right fucking mind would label Ghost the band as anything less that pretentious theatrical pop music and everyone would agree with it, wholeheartedly and I would stop having to read about the band on all my metal news sites.
Yeah, I'm fairly picky about my metal subgenres for someone who's been listening to Lana Del Rey all week long. I'm aware. But this isn't about that.
Let's have an Internet where you pick your genre and the only thing you can see/watch/read are things that pertain to that specific genre.
Cute dogs.
Politics.
Sugar.
Hardcore porn.
Demotivational memes.
And so on, etc. Because I get tired of going looking for porn and finding politics. I get sick of finding a batch of cute puppy videos sandwiched between posts debating whether or not the poster is an asshole and food blogs. I don't want to watch a Lana Del Rey video and find Chinese propaganda social credit score stuff in my sidebar.
I don't want to see your world. Don't want the current events. Don't want to mistakenly stumble across a video of protesters getting gassed and don't want anything about Ghost in my fucking universe.
And yes, women look at porn online too. YES EVEN WITH A HOUSEFUL OF MEN.
(Honestly I'm just trying to find better/different positions for the size differences between me and them. Shut the fuck up.)