It's a beautiful day today. My boys are still sleeping in the cool breeze, and the devil followed me as I took my coffee and my thick stack of tech outside to the patio to do a little early work before I get inundated with attention. I'm sure he's just here in case the bears show up, or that bunny, or the dragonflies that have made their appearance at last. We also have a roster of small birds and an OWL if you can believe it, though I have only heard him in the woods in front of the house and not gone looking for him yet.
Caleb sips his own coffee and pretends to read the paper on his ipad. He's watching me without looking and it's a comfortable feeling for me. Lochlan and I continued our talk last evening. It's not that Lochlan is trying to sabotage me, hell, he'd be thrilled if I gave up Caleb for good, but he's concerned that if I do anything as a moment-of-clarity action or a knee-jerk reaction it usually is short-lived because it's made via my rare and legendary temper. Once the temper subsides, so does the resolve and he would rather these decisions be made rationally and by the light of day. He's also weirdly concerned with Caleb's outlier status.
Which Caleb bestowed upon himself so I have no sympathy for that. But then again I don't have the perspective of the boys on this at all to understand how I've changed their behaviour (I haven't, that's on them) or clouded their judgment. Bridget the drug. Bridget the brass ring. Yeah yeah. I've heard it all before. Still doesn't mean he should ever be a monster to me. Not in MY house.
Gage has been completely absent. He, Duncan and Dalton are embarking on a short road trip and will be back probably at the end of the week since travel within the province is semi-feasible now. He gave me a perfunctory hug goodbye and said to take care and that he'd be back and that was that. It's weird, I know and honestly having three less giant men in the house means there's a little space here this week so it's a bonus. And Duncan continues to text me every eight seconds so not like I have time to miss them.
I move my legs out of the sun and Caleb's head snaps up. He fell asleep. Hahahaha. I bark at him to go back to bed and he said he's fine so I go back to ignoring him. I'm going to milk every moment of this summer, eating outside, hanging in the garden, painting pictures of my flowers, soaking up the peace and quiet. It's going to be so lovely. No one's going to fuck with it. I have no travel plans, no huge plans involving building anything or needing to celebrate anything enormous, so this will be a good summer because it has to be, and he's not allowed to ruin it.