As is the case with life, eventually the whole house will succumb to the sickness that comes into it. Considering the toothbrushes sit beside the bathroom sink in a ceramic coffee cup, more often touching than not. Considering the kisses and long embraces and cold air that makes for closed windows and the return of school days in which I'm beginning to suspect they pipe germs through the ventilation system for compliance from the older grades.
I can't get my head off the table today. I can't hear a thing and I can't speak. One of those days where you burst into tears only because you feel so damned sick and you're frustrated. Because you know that you still have to cook and clean and work and comfort everyone else and you're down to the painful stub of your own resources. We're not even getting dressed today and I'm jumping through phone hoops to cancel therapy this morning because the idea of putting on clothes and driving downtown to sit in a dry room to be dissected for ninety minutes would be more painful than decapitation at this point, I think.
I was washing dishes earlier, leaning heavily against the counter, doing an awful job, when Jacob's arms came around me and he took over and told me to take it easy. I pointed out that he was sick too and should get some rest and he laughed and told me I wasn't in this alone. That he loves being able to cancel days and say out loud that his wife and children are sick, instead of pretending to have a family, or wishing he did. To be able to find that sort of perverted glee in a bad cold/flu made me laugh but I was touched at the same time. He still has so much joy in being here, in being part of this family, even in being sick along with us that makes me feel a whole lot better. It almost makes up for the sicknesses that can't be cured with prescriptions, rest and liquids. It makes up for so many things.
It makes me feel a little more normal and a lot more grateful.
Off to rest and drink tea for the rest of the day, and sleep, hopefully. One of my favorite things in the world these days is crawling under a warm blanket into Jacob's arms and having a late afternoon nap. I hope there's one in here somewhere today.
If you have any ideas for getting through the rest of the winter without our usual rounds of colds and flu bugs drop me a line. I would like to tackle this season head on, instead of playing catch-up until May.
