I feel like I'm losing for money
I feel like I'm losing for free
I feel older than the dead angel on my shoulder claims to be
I feel like we're drinking and driving
I feel like we're running into walls
I feel like swimming in your apathy as a kind of parody
For miles and miles, miles
I feel like somebody's missing
I think that somebody's missing
I think somebody's missing
Tried the song on this morning, though I'm forced to sing along because I don't know the tab on piano and it's too much of a rollercoaster ride to sing to be able to focus on anything else anyway. My spirit animal looms large today, singing comfortingly into the cavern of my skull, enjoying the acoustics of my pickled brain. The chorus, oh, my heavens this is why God invented music for me, I swear to Him.
And to Matthew Good, God of my emotional lows because dammit, he's a litmus test for whether or not things are working and clearly I can feel this so bad I guess they're not. Or maybe Lochlan has asked them to back off a little in case my brain doesn't bounce back and he doesn't recognize me here, like this. He can appreciate the late-stage Radiohead-worthy guitar solo but then the final lines ruin him.
(I feel like somebody's missiiiiiiiiiing.)
Right. That would be Jacob but the spectre of Jacob is still right here and excuse me, I thought someone was going to fix this and did I go through all of that punishment to my liver and my memories for nothing? Please don't tell me I did.
I'm taking this song for a bit, honey.
No you're NOT.
Then skip ahead to the next. I'm not going to let you fall today.
I press the button.
Apparitions begins and my whole face splits open in a grateful grin as his own face falls apart in response.
Jake leans down and speaks softly into my ear. I think I'm going to give him a break and just take off for a bit.
I reply without looking at him, my eyes not leaving Lochlan. Don't go.
Lochlan says evenly, fighting for composure. I'm not going anywhere, Peanut. Why won't you believe me?