I am almost a week late on this, but The Thunder Rolls has a fourth verse and it reallllllly sucks that hardly any of the covers feature it, for it is the resolution of the song itself and if you're going to sing a story-song but leave out the highly rewarding conclusion then you are doing a disservice to all of us, to yourself and to the fucking song.
It goes like this:
She runs back down the hallway
And through the bedroom door
She reaches for the pistol
Kept in the dresser drawer
Tells the lady in mirror
He won't do this again
'Cause tonight will be the last time
She'll wonder where he's been
We need closure, guys. You can't have a swashbuckling, violent, lightning-strike filled song and not finish it. But this most recent attempt (The band is State of Play) gets credit for the band part of the video, especially the singer who looks like PJ (!!) but not for the guy with the fauxhawk who would have flat hair in that much rain, thanks. But damn, that last verse is the part we need, and not a cheesy video recreation of the first three verses that we don't need to be hand-held through. I hate those. I refused to do one once in a video and they changed the whole thing to make it super symbolic/esoteric instead and it went on to become the most successful video the band ever did. Just saying. Don't dumb down for your audience. The ones who need it will never appreciate it and the ones who don't need it will resent you forever.
So it looks like Overscene's cover reigns supreme because they do the fourth verse by default. I love that. Kudos. But Garth's original is still the GOAT.
****
Guess what time of the year it is? Right. Not BC day or Groundhog day or Valentine's Day approaching, but tax time, and the negotiations to do them, because I am trustworthy and obviously discreet and so this is apparently my burden. My titan is a huge walking T1 form, I guess when I'd rather be Jaw.
(We're caught up on Attack on Titan! JESSSSSSUSSSSS so many episodes. I never thought we'd finish but here we are, now waiting for weeklies.)
(Also look up the Jaw titan. Definitely the coolest.)
Caleb came to me early this morning. Name your price.
I am BUSY and I don't want to think about taxes. I am busy singing Keep the Wolves Away and plucking at the guitar. It hurts my fingers. Ben promised nylon strings for this little backpacker guitar a thousand years ago and it still has metal ones. Since Caleb's here I'll change some of the lyrics on the fly just to stick it to him good. But after his stand n' glare I put the guitar down and think for a minute.
Three of everything from that online shop. The stationery one. Including the Sailor pens. All the pens. That's how serious I am.
He calls my bluff. Of course he does. That it?
And a cash bonus.
Have a figure in mind?
Fifty.
Fifty dollars?
Fifty thousand.
For the taxes for the whole point?
No?Also you can write off your tax preparer.
I know she would like me to.
Ha.
How about we just do this house, and August if you like and I round it up to a whole number.
Sixty?
One hundred and fifty.
I wonder if two weeks straight of solid taxes is worth an average years income.
According to you, yes. It's like watching someone turn themselves inside out.
Then have a professional do it.
No. I would rather do it myself and take my chances up against the government than bring in an outside party.
Right so that's pressure on me.
You don't break any rules.
Of course I don't.
That's why I need you. Everyone else wants to gamble.
(They do! They say to claim everything, to hide as much income as you can and then hope the government doesn't notice for seven years. Then they get you to sign on the dotted line saying they're not responsible if the goverment does notice. It isn't worth it and you shouldn't do it, I think. Earn the dime, claim the time.)
Fine.
Settling for one fifty and a big haul from your store, then?
Yes. I am dejected, defeated and burdened now. My voice is flat, my face expressionless. I fucking HATE taxes. But now I can go around and negotiate a price for everyone else and that's always fun because I go easy on them and they give me everything I ever wanted and then some.
There will be a bonus, as always. He dangles it over my head like raw meat, dripping blood into my eyes.
Your bonuses are usually dangerous.
The way you like them best.