I am drawing in the gazebo, left along for moments as Lochlan runs in to grab us coffee. He is reading and catching up on news, I'm trying to do a simple storyboard for a short film idea I pitched to someone who wanted to do one and had no ideas and I've never done one before so I struggle and it's overdetailed and almost painful and yet it's the dumbest, most innocent thing.
Yup, just described myself. I laugh out loud at the thought.
It's nice to hear you laughing, Princess. Jake is sitting on the steps, just beyond the reach of the overhang. getting soaked. I stare at him as his shirt grows dark, from the shoulders and back down. He doesn't seem to mind. I don't think he ever did. He's a Big Feeler. Like me. Maybe not dumb or innocent but definitely overly cognizant of the weather and the moon and the stars and all the feelings to be felt whether you welcomed them (and him) or not.
I don't think you're supposed to be here. I start packing up. He's just watching now.
Nice supplies. Who bought you those?
Don't you have somewhere to be?
I'm where I need to be. Shadowing my girl.
I shove everything in the nylon tote I used to carry it all out here. Don't follow me in!
Piglet, I-
You're not actually here. You're not real. You're not talking to me and I need to call Lochlan back outside-
Peanut who are you talking to? I turn around, clutching up my things, ready to run and Lochlan's back with a cup of hot coffee in each hand. He's been indulging me in self-care where I can't. Lots of breaks. Lots of treats and quiet moments. Lots of time, just doing nothing. Is it working? I thought it was but it isn't if Jacob is here and suddenly three's a crowd.
I have a headache. I'm trying to talk myself out of it before I talk myself into it.
You're not crazy, Bridget.
Tell that to him, I point to the far wall of the gazebo where Jacob leans against it, wet-shirted, concern all over his face.
Schuyler walks into view, coming across the lawn. Perfect timing. Lochlan thinks I mean Sky and not Jake.
You guys have a disagreement I need to know about?
No, I'm resigned. I just think I'm still really really tired, Lochlan.
Well then stop carrying that arse around. He points to Jake. He's too big for you anyways.