Thursday, 20 April 2006


It's ironic that when you need a place the most to get your thoughts out you remember it's become a very public place in recent months. Having the traffic means you're subjected to the opinions of people you don't know and the harsh judgements of those you do know. I think I've called everyone who had to be called, if not my apologies because I'm a little bit rattled. If you're finding out here technically you're still finding out from me. The horse's mouth. The whore, I mean.

I left Trey* yesterday.

I'm okay, he's okay. Everyone is fine. How odd.

Long stories. I can't get the words out well this morning and I'm dazed. fucking dazed.

Maybe more later or tomorrow or when I need to write. Probably later when I have had forty more coffees because I have been awake all night thinking.

*(Trey was Cole's forever nickname. When he put on his glasses he looked a little like Trey Anastasio. We're so endless with the nicknames here but this one stuck for fifteen years.)