Have I slept? No I haven't slept. Lochlan finally turned away and implored me to let him get at least some rest and we would deal with details tomorrow. The last wedding of Sam and Matt was a devastatingly poignant moment on the beach at night during the winter solstice. It started snowing. We had a devil of a time ferrying guests back and forth. Caleb ended up getting a plane. It made four stops. The work of dismantling the dinner on the beach took four days and I will never forget the beauty of that night or their words or the fact that I may not have cried so hard at any point since.
Sam says this one will be smaller. In-house with his community minister popping by to officiate in the foyer or maybe the front porch but otherwise no fuss, he says.
Oh, I'm making a fuss, I told him. A big fucking fuss.
Bridget, we're just undoing a mistake we made. Let's keep things light.
We will but it still has to be special. You need to mark this with-
Bridge-
Just let me whip up something beautiful. What's your limit on people? Who does Matt need? All I need is a guest list and I'm good-
Anyone who wants to be there. We'll need you and Lochlan and Ben but otherwise if anyone's free or not, it's fine. Short notice. I don't expect any bells this time. We're literally just re-legalizing.
Sam, don't you dare sell love short to someone like me.
Okay, uh...how's this? Make it beautiful but very small. Like you.
***
Google has done a thing to Blogger and I'm struggling, guys. I have no free time to figure it out so if my formatting gets weird it's not me. I am a Luddite, a basics girl. I don't know any HTML and they've smushed it all together with numbered lines and it's impossible so bear with me for a few years and just when I get it they'll change something else. I can't even figure out how to get my phone to stop taking live photos or how to turn on the television or the x-box anymore so yeah...sorry.
***
Caleb isn't too happy that I gave Matt and Sam a big old wedding gift of myself. No, he's not happy at all. He made an elaborate breakfast for us and just as I was about to take my first bite of eggs Benedict he asked me to detail what happened.
Um, what?
I want to know if Matt touched you.
Do you now? I return my fork to my plate and put my hands on the sides of the chair. I want to be ready to run when he flips this table. Or burns down my universe.
That's a yes if you're getting ready to bolt.
No, I'm just aware of your temper and how it translates to me.
Bridget, can't you just stay put?
Can't you just be happy they figured it out and are back together?
I just don't understand how you factor in.
I think for a moment. I could give him the slap in the face of the truth or I can blur the edges a little so that it doesn't cut quite so deep. It was probably just a impulsive decision to test their commitment. I don't know. I was home with Lochlan very early. I shrug for effect.
Caleb flips the table anyway with a reminder not to lie to his face. Not to break his heart. Not to Always. Put. Him. Last. Or at least that's what I think he yelled. I could hardly hear him for the thunderous sounds of footsteps running toward us.