Thursday 25 October 2018

Hi-burn-ate.

Lochlan rolled over onto his back this morning and covered his eyes with one hand.

Headache? I ask. I lurched awake when the cold rushed in to wrap around me, from where his warm skin had been before. Such a good sleep with him wrapped around me. Window open so that the air is cold and we cocoon as deep as we can under the quilts, listening to the rain.

No, just tired. 

Didn't you sleep? I am disappointed at the thought of him being restless all night.

A little. Anyway. Gotta get moving.  As long as you got some sleep I'm fine.

Today is counselling day two. I don't have to work and so we go in early, emerging early in order to put all of our skills to use. In order to have the day to think over things we've said, elephants we've addressed and plans we've put into place.

The earrings will be going with me so that for once Caleb can hear from someone else why you can't smooth over massive rifts with money. That would be too easy and like I've said before, I signed up for the hard-way method in life. Sam says the rewards will be greater this way.

***

Last night while cleaning up from supper PJ remarked that it is stupidly dark for six in the afternoon.

Here comes winter, I frown at him. We both hate the time change, hate the long slow march toward spring, hate the dark, hate the cold, hate that we hate those things and then hate each other for enabling, for giving it a voice, for acknowledging the wait. Or the weight, if you will.

Honestly eight of these weeks and the days will begin to get longer again, Dalton says, unhelpfully after overhearing our grousing. Roll with it. Pretend it's not happening, he suggests.

Bah. It's too late for that, I tell him. Wake me up when the sun goes down at nine pm again.