I..er..have a bodyguard today.
(And IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII will always love yooooooooouuuuuuuo)
Thankfully he's better looking than Kevin Costner and much bigger too. And he eats whatever you put in front of him, saying yes please and thank you and he doesn't let anyone get away with a damned thing.
Including me.
(John's actually driving me nuts. Any takers? He's six-two, long brown hair, long beard, looks like Mark Morton when he smiles and wears enough flannel to make all your dreams come true. And yes, ladies, his boots are a size 14. All the dreams, let me tell you. He has better manners than most and he's retired (accident/settlement) from the industry so no worries about being left alone for endless tours. But he's fine. Other than being too good at keeping me in line, he's good.)
So breakfast with Batman was interesting because Batman took an inordinate amount of time to put his poker face on when he saw John and John very graciously and gently pointed out that he would sit at a different table if Batman would like. Fortunately Batman is a gentleman and shifted the whole tone of the morning into something completely different and we ate together.
Or rather, he talked and I ate everything. Sunday was light on food somehow. There were Monte Cristos. I think Lochlan ate them. So I drank his whiskey to fill the hole and got a little (or maybe a lot) shitfaced before they had time to notice.
What're you doing, Peanut?
Building a hurricane, Locket, I told him with great conviction and then fell off the bed, bottle and all.
So today no one was taking chances and I'm sure that Batman wanted to discuss how ridiculous I am but he demurred in John's presence (or perhaps he realizes John already knows how ridiculous I am) and we talked about Christmas instead.
Which was dumb because I may have hit the lights a week ago but I'm not allowed to put any trees up until a month from now. I have to figure out how to charm them around it. Or maybe I can use leverage. I mean, what's the point of having some much of it if I can't put it to good use?
When are you putting up your tree? I ask Batman as I finish his fried potatoes and his orange juice too. So thirsty. John snorts with a laugh but says nothing, watching the rain out the window.
I was thinking this weekend.
I stop chewing. That's leverage. If they won't let me put up my tree I'll threaten to go enjoy his. Not like everyone isn't learning that calling my bluffs brings those bluffs running from miles away.
