Sunday, 13 April 2008

The energetic nature of volume.

    will it change your life if I change my mind?
    when she's lit the whole wide world
    I want to know if you will beg me and then tell me how to love you
    like anybody else would
    I know you're risking failure, (risking failure)
    but I'd hope you set your levels (for how long)
    so you can run for cover
    you better start to love her
    now are we this pathetic?
    you made me finally see it
    (will it change your life when I change my mind,
    will it change your mind when I change my life)

You know how life just ticks along and then you get thrown all kinds of curveballs? Things you don't expect?

Yes, like that. You know exactly what I'm talking about. Good. Don't get comfortable, then.

Is it Saturday? It seems to be. PJ called me Muffin today. He hasn't done that in years. Ruth went on her first sleepover at a friend's house for a birthday, leaving me feeling panicky and overprotective and Henry got to stay up late and watch movies and eat chocolaty things and be spoiled.

I mailed off some unsolicited short stories today that will probably be rejected in due course. I learned I buy jeans too big and that my ego is so fragile I'm amazed I can get out of bed in the morning.

But I do anyway.

Because I'm Bridget. The former Saltwater Princess and that nickname is nothing more than a painful reminder now of a romantic dream-like state that had all the stamina of a bubble blown by a child on a rainy day. I'll just be Bridget, and you can be Internet, and we can pretend we get along.

It's a good night.

I feel happy.

I have Beg by Evans Blue firmly lodged in my head. How in the hell did that happen?