Batman called this morning. Told me he was having the time of his life, and the only thing missing was me. That this should be a required life event and that when he comes back he hopes to spend more time with me, having fun. Not in any sordid way, just in general. He was envious of our night of dancing, he said and he'd love to join us for the next show.
What if it's like Slayer or something non-danceable?
Then we'll dance to it anyway. Why the hell not?
(Well, there's the biggest indication that he's taking the drugs right there. Batman is not a 'why the hell not' type of guy, honestly.)
Bridget, you there?
I'm here.
I love you.
I bet you do.
August called too. He said it's even more awful than last year and he'll probably come back before Saturday. He wants to know how I feel, what everyone is doing (to me, probably and not just in general), and if I want to talk for a while, if so he can go find a charging cord and we can continue in a bit. I let him off the hook. I'm too tired for barometers and too sad that he's not here to listen to his voice without the accompanying physical presence.
Caleb called and said he'd bring me next year but only if we have a private RV. He said he transferred some money to me for the children's school needs, since school starts in a week. I told him he didn't have to do that and he said he likes to, that it's important to him to have a hand in taking care of us. Then he said he should be taking care of me and when he comes home from the desert he's going to do just that.
Gage called and said I should be there too. That it's perfect for me.
Keith called and said Gage is full of shit and that I am too good for the whole of Black Rock City.
New Jake called and asked if I really was worried about him.
I always worry about you, Jake. But the k is silent. My mouth won't finish his name out loud. Mostly his name seems to be 'Jay' now.
Bridget, I'm a grown man.
You're a diabetic in a shitty environment for staying healthy.
I'm not doing drugs. And I'm testing. And I'm fine. If you're that worried I'll go get on a plane.
What? Why would you do that?
To give you the peace of mind no one ever affords you.
No one can afford me, I tell myself. The cost is far too high.
What was that, Bridget? I don't think the connection is very good. I can barely hear you.
Nothing, I say at a normal voice and his voice smiles. Ah. You're back.
I never left, I tell him. Have fun, okay?
It is, actually. August and I are talking a lot. It's nice to have brothers. They're all good guys.
Yeah, they are.
It's like a deeper bonding experience but with less distractions. Not like at home.
What do you mean?
You're not here. You're the punctuation. You're the focus of the point, you know? Worshipped and watched over. The sun rises and sets by you in a way that totally supersedes any random girls walking around here. There's zero energy in any of them. They throw themselves at us and no one bites.
Oh, Jesus.
Yeah, I'm not sure if that's really really bad or very very good. We were trying to figure it out.
And?
There's just no one like you, Bridget, and we wouldn't trade you for the world.
He broke my heart via phone. They all did.
