I guess I'm learning, I must be warmer now
I'll soon be turning, round the corner now
Outside the dawn is breaking
But inside in the dark I'm aching to be free
The show must go on
The show must go on
Inside my heart is breaking
My makeup may be flaking
But my smile still stays on
My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies
Fairytales of yesterday will grow but never die
I can fly - my friends
The show must go on
The show must go on
I'll face it with a grin
I'm never giving in
On with the show
I'll top the bill, I'll overkill
I have to find the will to carry on
On with the
On with the show.
Sunday, 4 April 2010
Church on the water.
Best Easter egg hunt EVER.
On a yacht.
Good morning and happy Easter. Yes, the champagne is still flowing and the children are eating chocolate and we're below deck because it's cool this morning but that's fine. Everything is gold plated so if you stare long enough it's just like looking into the sun.
I was skeptical of the wifi thing even and then Caleb told me that if I wanted something all I had to do is ask for it. The boys find this amusing but I don't run like this. I stay behind. I fall behind, mostly because I can't keep up with this sort of lifestyle. I'm too full of wonderment and innocence.
And so I asked for a Monte Cristo for breakfast and someone was dispatched to get it.
I believe the staff on this boat have their own staff. I believe that I may spend the rest of the weekend here. I believe in fairy tales.
Oh come on.
Shortly I'm going to turn back into a pumpkin and we're going to go to IKEA. Because I adore IKEA and I plan to scope out new dressers for the kids for when we are settled. And coffee. Oddly the coffee here isn't that good but I don't dare say anything because then they'll send someone else out and really I don't think this is reasonable anymore.
*poof*
I wonder if pumpkins talk when no one's there to hear them. I wonder if Sam is mad at us.
I wonder if these pigs are going to eventually block out the sun with their wings? Like Icarus but with bacon. Mmmmmm, crispy clouds .
Okay, enough champagne. We're headed home.
On a yacht.
Good morning and happy Easter. Yes, the champagne is still flowing and the children are eating chocolate and we're below deck because it's cool this morning but that's fine. Everything is gold plated so if you stare long enough it's just like looking into the sun.
I was skeptical of the wifi thing even and then Caleb told me that if I wanted something all I had to do is ask for it. The boys find this amusing but I don't run like this. I stay behind. I fall behind, mostly because I can't keep up with this sort of lifestyle. I'm too full of wonderment and innocence.
And so I asked for a Monte Cristo for breakfast and someone was dispatched to get it.
I believe the staff on this boat have their own staff. I believe that I may spend the rest of the weekend here. I believe in fairy tales.
Oh come on.
Shortly I'm going to turn back into a pumpkin and we're going to go to IKEA. Because I adore IKEA and I plan to scope out new dressers for the kids for when we are settled. And coffee. Oddly the coffee here isn't that good but I don't dare say anything because then they'll send someone else out and really I don't think this is reasonable anymore.
*poof*
I wonder if pumpkins talk when no one's there to hear them. I wonder if Sam is mad at us.
I wonder if these pigs are going to eventually block out the sun with their wings? Like Icarus but with bacon. Mmmmmm, crispy clouds .
Okay, enough champagne. We're headed home.
Saturday, 3 April 2010
The internet needs a breathalizer.
If you're in the mood, please take my place this evening. I'm exhausted. Thank you and goodnight. Enjoy the party. It's on your behalf. Or your bewhole. Something of the sort. Caleb's throwing it. Doesn't he always? He networks more than Telus and knows more people than Jesus. I would totally worry about that except for the fact that I already have proof that he is Satan and he already took my soul.
Rambling. Don't want to go, would much rather sleep. But that would be ungracious of my bewhole.
Haha.
Drinking, yes. Sorry. No other way to find courage for this one.
Rambling. Don't want to go, would much rather sleep. But that would be ungracious of my bewhole.
Haha.
Drinking, yes. Sorry. No other way to find courage for this one.
Home at last.
Yesterday we took the first chance we had to really escape from the city and explore up into the mountains a little. We drove to Whistler, which was so delightful, in spite of the bad storm that seemed to be happening in a bubble around us. To us it didn't seem all that bad, actually but I think we stayed ahead of it somehow.
Last time I drove the sea to sky highway was 1993. It's grown up so much, mostly in part I believe due to the Olympics. However, I'm not bitter, it was nice to have a mostly divided road and lots of places to stop along the way. We saw waterfalls and wildlife and North Face everything, everywhere. What used to be remote is now a tourist mecca and Whistler was awash in dollar bills. Lots of dollar bills.
And it snowed heavily the entire time we were up there. To the point where I turned to Ben and told him I was sure I said I was done with snow now, thank you, may we please go back to the city?
He thought I was joking and we did not go back until it began to get dark and by then I think our explorer urges were sated for one day anyway. Off to drink wine (me) and sit in dimly-lit restaurants eating yummy dinner and oh, wait.
That place.
I fell in love with it to a wicked extent. Like more than that other neighborhood and it seems vaguely more doable. Okay, it's completely doable. I'm not even sure I'm calling it by the right name, I just know that I pointed from the road and Ben nodded and Caleb called someone and really that's pretty much the way I operate when the boys are around. Bridget chooses, Ben confirms and Satan chips off a piece of the princess-soul and smiles his lies and things happen.
There are some islands and some beautiful glass houses chipped into the front of the mountain and it's all ocean and salt and beauty and yeah, it didn't take any sort of wonderment or questioning on my part. I know exactly what I want when I see it and so this part was almost too easy. Like things are when you have no soul left maybe, or because we've been fortunate in so many ways while being so goddamned unlucky in others.
Doesn't matter. The view is going to wrap around what's left of my soul and then I won't notice the huge pieces that are gone, that won't grow back, that can't be replaced.
I would have given the rest for this. I still might.
Last time I drove the sea to sky highway was 1993. It's grown up so much, mostly in part I believe due to the Olympics. However, I'm not bitter, it was nice to have a mostly divided road and lots of places to stop along the way. We saw waterfalls and wildlife and North Face everything, everywhere. What used to be remote is now a tourist mecca and Whistler was awash in dollar bills. Lots of dollar bills.
And it snowed heavily the entire time we were up there. To the point where I turned to Ben and told him I was sure I said I was done with snow now, thank you, may we please go back to the city?
He thought I was joking and we did not go back until it began to get dark and by then I think our explorer urges were sated for one day anyway. Off to drink wine (me) and sit in dimly-lit restaurants eating yummy dinner and oh, wait.
That place.
I fell in love with it to a wicked extent. Like more than that other neighborhood and it seems vaguely more doable. Okay, it's completely doable. I'm not even sure I'm calling it by the right name, I just know that I pointed from the road and Ben nodded and Caleb called someone and really that's pretty much the way I operate when the boys are around. Bridget chooses, Ben confirms and Satan chips off a piece of the princess-soul and smiles his lies and things happen.
There are some islands and some beautiful glass houses chipped into the front of the mountain and it's all ocean and salt and beauty and yeah, it didn't take any sort of wonderment or questioning on my part. I know exactly what I want when I see it and so this part was almost too easy. Like things are when you have no soul left maybe, or because we've been fortunate in so many ways while being so goddamned unlucky in others.
Doesn't matter. The view is going to wrap around what's left of my soul and then I won't notice the huge pieces that are gone, that won't grow back, that can't be replaced.
I would have given the rest for this. I still might.
Friday, 2 April 2010
Delicious dark mornings.
There is rain pouring down the window beside me and it's so dark out this morning. I am currently waiting for Ben to wake up so we can drive up north into the rain and spend time together and maybe nail down which neighborhood we plan to terrorize for the rest of our quiet dark lives.
I noticed on my visitor information that someone searched for REAL FRENCH PRINCESS IN GLASS CASE THATS DEAD late last night while I slept, and was directed to my journal.
Welcome, Missouri. I like you already. But I'm actually not French, if that's something that's going to stand between us.
More tonight, my chickens. Adventure first, words later.
I noticed on my visitor information that someone searched for REAL FRENCH PRINCESS IN GLASS CASE THATS DEAD late last night while I slept, and was directed to my journal.
Welcome, Missouri. I like you already. But I'm actually not French, if that's something that's going to stand between us.
More tonight, my chickens. Adventure first, words later.
Thursday, 1 April 2010
Dragon breath.
I have my car!!!!
Yay!
Ben took us for a long drive all around the water. The ocean at night here is just as glorious as back home. Then we stopped for donairs (west coast donairs made Halifax style, no less) and came home because it's late. And it's been a long week. I'm happy that the car is here. I mean, having a driver is fun and all but it's not the same. I can make a mess in my car. You really think I can wait until we get home to sneak a few bites?
You've obviously never had a donair the way I like them: extra meat, sweet sauce, tomato and raw onions only.
My next plan is to kiss everyone in sight. Thank God I'm cute.
Yay!
Ben took us for a long drive all around the water. The ocean at night here is just as glorious as back home. Then we stopped for donairs (west coast donairs made Halifax style, no less) and came home because it's late. And it's been a long week. I'm happy that the car is here. I mean, having a driver is fun and all but it's not the same. I can make a mess in my car. You really think I can wait until we get home to sneak a few bites?
You've obviously never had a donair the way I like them: extra meat, sweet sauce, tomato and raw onions only.
My next plan is to kiss everyone in sight. Thank God I'm cute.
Muscles, metal and beards.
It's Clash day, dear readers, and lord knows, Bridget loves her knight movies. Muck, muscle, bring it, I'm there. It's my happy place.
Okay, it's one of many, but one of the few socially acceptable formats of escape.
I have more, I'm tired though so later. The laptop must be shared these days with a little blonde boy who likes to play warcraft. Who is going to say no to HIM?
Not I, said the spider to the fly.
Okay, it's one of many, but one of the few socially acceptable formats of escape.
I have more, I'm tired though so later. The laptop must be shared these days with a little blonde boy who likes to play warcraft. Who is going to say no to HIM?
Not I, said the spider to the fly.
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