Last evening PJ tried to block me from taking the recycling bin out. I can do it, he said. Go relax.
PJ doesn't micromanage me unless there's a reas-
Move, PJ. I push backwards against the bin he's now holding but he's squared himself in the doorway, filling it.
Ben is with them. It's fine. Let them deal with it and don't put yourself in the way. Also, what gets into Lochlan? I thought he was cool with you doing you and was going to back off.
Oh, he's fine with me doing me as long as no one else does me. He wanes between confidence and total paranoia though. Like I do. It's called being human, PJ, you should try i-
HEY. Don't shoot the messenger. I just want to know which side of him to stay on. Not like I haven't been in Caleb's position.
Are you going to move so I can go manage my life?
Hell, no.
Then I'll go out the front door. I take off running up the stairs and through the kitchen and out the front door, down the walk, down the steps and to the left toward the boathouse and there's...PJ. Who put down the bin, walked through the side door and waited for me. He cages out with both arms and dares me to try and get through him.
God. I've never hosed on a dare in my life so I run straight at him. The plan is to vault his shoulders if I can get enough speed but he closes his arms like a vise around me, my feet off the ground.
FUCK, PJ!
Hush. Making scenes is his thing. I follow PJ's gaze and Caleb, Lochlan and Ben are at the top of the stairs coming down from Caleb's.
Lochlan shoves past both of them. The fuck, Padraig. He pulls me out of PJ's arms and tucks me in against his chest with one arm. Ben's face is completely unreadable. Caleb turns without a word and goes back into the boathouse.
PJ takes the bin to the garage.
Party's over, I guess.
What did you do, Locket? The question is soft. I don't even hear myself ask him.
Don't worry about it.
Ben heads inside too and Lochlan turns to me, wrapping his arms around my head, sighing. Remember when you were following me? That first night you went into the woods, Bridge?
I nod. That was the beginning of everything. He asked me to trust him. Told me to listen to him. I've followed him around ever since.
Go back, Bridgie.
I can't. It's dark and I'm scared.
Then why did you follow me?
I wanted to see where you were going.
Why?
Because I want to be there.
What do you mean?
Where you are. I want to be where you are.
He accepted that answer, nodded and turned to keep walking into the dark, never questioning his little shadow again. I didn't actually know that he was Peter Pan then, leader of the lost boys, none of whom would ever grow up. I do now.
Why won't you do that anymore?
I shrug under the weight of his arms. I don't know.
That didn't matter when you were little.
It's harder now. Everything is more complicated.
Then make it simple.
What about Caleb?
He's prepared to wait and see what you do.
Did you threaten him?
I reasoned with him. He pushed away and left me there, heading inside.
And I followed.
PJ doesn't micromanage me unless there's a reas-
Move, PJ. I push backwards against the bin he's now holding but he's squared himself in the doorway, filling it.
Ben is with them. It's fine. Let them deal with it and don't put yourself in the way. Also, what gets into Lochlan? I thought he was cool with you doing you and was going to back off.
Oh, he's fine with me doing me as long as no one else does me. He wanes between confidence and total paranoia though. Like I do. It's called being human, PJ, you should try i-
HEY. Don't shoot the messenger. I just want to know which side of him to stay on. Not like I haven't been in Caleb's position.
Are you going to move so I can go manage my life?
Hell, no.
Then I'll go out the front door. I take off running up the stairs and through the kitchen and out the front door, down the walk, down the steps and to the left toward the boathouse and there's...PJ. Who put down the bin, walked through the side door and waited for me. He cages out with both arms and dares me to try and get through him.
God. I've never hosed on a dare in my life so I run straight at him. The plan is to vault his shoulders if I can get enough speed but he closes his arms like a vise around me, my feet off the ground.
FUCK, PJ!
Hush. Making scenes is his thing. I follow PJ's gaze and Caleb, Lochlan and Ben are at the top of the stairs coming down from Caleb's.
Lochlan shoves past both of them. The fuck, Padraig. He pulls me out of PJ's arms and tucks me in against his chest with one arm. Ben's face is completely unreadable. Caleb turns without a word and goes back into the boathouse.
PJ takes the bin to the garage.
Party's over, I guess.
What did you do, Locket? The question is soft. I don't even hear myself ask him.
Don't worry about it.
Ben heads inside too and Lochlan turns to me, wrapping his arms around my head, sighing. Remember when you were following me? That first night you went into the woods, Bridge?
I nod. That was the beginning of everything. He asked me to trust him. Told me to listen to him. I've followed him around ever since.
Go back, Bridgie.
I can't. It's dark and I'm scared.
Then why did you follow me?
I wanted to see where you were going.
Why?
Because I want to be there.
What do you mean?
Where you are. I want to be where you are.
He accepted that answer, nodded and turned to keep walking into the dark, never questioning his little shadow again. I didn't actually know that he was Peter Pan then, leader of the lost boys, none of whom would ever grow up. I do now.
Why won't you do that anymore?
I shrug under the weight of his arms. I don't know.
That didn't matter when you were little.
It's harder now. Everything is more complicated.
Then make it simple.
What about Caleb?
He's prepared to wait and see what you do.
Did you threaten him?
I reasoned with him. He pushed away and left me there, heading inside.
And I followed.