You may be rightI'm telling him the story of how Duncan got invited for a second coveted visit, that Duncan agreed and then at the last second he said he wanted me to come back downstairs with him alone, that he didn't need an audience, thanks, and he'd bring me back up before I fell asleep. That he worked alone, as a rule. But that he's much obliged, as ever, to have the honor. And the trust.
But I don't care
So moving on
What did they do?
Nothing. You should have seen the shock on their faces though.
So did you go?
No, I got spooked. I feel like I don't really know Duncan like that. I'm not ready to be alone-alone with him. Naked-alone. Like this.
I see. He lifts my dress up over my head. I sit obediently in his lap, facing him, arms up to facilitate.
Plus I'm suddenly worried that Lochlan's going to die so I didn't want to take any risks.
That Caleb might-
No, that he'll just vanish somehow.
It's normal. Do you want to talk instead of this? He's kissing up my throat, along my jaw and I nod and then shake my head no and he pauses.
Talk after. I unbutton his shirt and stick my face in between the buttons and the buttonholes. He's so warm.
I like this. He rubs his thumb along the band of my sweetheart bra. It's embroidered with roses and peonies in blush, lavender and pale blue. It's vintage.
Me too. I get up off his legs and head toward his room.
August stands up in a hurry, knocking his books off the arm of the couch and follows me to his bed. I crawl onto it while it swings slightly.
I keep trying to separate this but I can't, Bridget.
I'd rather you didn't anyway.
I should. I'm no better than Joel if I don't.
That's different.
How is it different? But he's pulling me up against him urgently, suddenly out of breath without reason, forcing me down without giving me the leeway to get there. So rough sometimes. Just like Jake. I pull his face down against mine and kiss him hard.
What are you doing, Bridget?
Trying to collect enough love.
And you're not there yet? But he doesn't wait for my answer. He just puts his head back down against my shoulder and begins to drive against me until we both forget what we were talking about.