It's early in the morning and his first gift to me is an admission I never wanted to know. It sent me to the garage where I stood in the dark calling softly for Jake. I didn't want Joel to hear me, but I had to take the chance anyway.
He finally shows up. The dust motes all around him from the windows into the dark make him look like he was buried on a shelf all this time. He looks faded but alert. And sad.
You're finally getting better, I haven't seen you for a long time.
I don't even tell him that every day I want to come here and summon him. That every damned day still hurts like a hot poker through my heart with every breath. Guilt doesn't affect ghosts though. That's one of the perks.
Caleb said that the night he came to the camper he was going to kill me afterward and hide my body in the woods.
Why did he say this?
He said it would have been better for all of them. Better for him. Lochlan would have been blamed for it and I wouldn't have been there to fight over anymore.
Bridget, I think you're in over your head here.
But he didn't do it because in the middle of everything he decided that in case maybe he can come back that it would be nice to keep hurting me throughout my whole life. That I would be his darkness and depravity and that he would just hold Lochlan at bay with threats, fill him with doubt, keep him down. Hurt him worse this way.
That's not okay, Bridget. I think it's time you sound the alarm.
I haven't done that after every single thing he's ever done. Why would I do it now?
Because he gets away with things.
He didn't get away with murder.
Yet.
He won't kill me. He's had every chance there is. He loves me too much.
Is that what you want to call it?
That's what I have to call it.
Then go back to your pretty little delusional life, Princess. You seem happiest there.
I'd rather stay with you.
Then push him just a little too hard and let him fulfill his destiny.
But do you think Lochlan will get his soul back if I do that?
Yes, but he'll have no use for it if you're gone.
