Today when I got to the empty shelf under the drill press on the workbench in the garage, I found a care package.
In it was a blanket, a pillow, a comic book, a granola bar, a bottle of water, a flashlight and a rubik's cube. I don't know who put it there, I just know I'd rather be out here than in there today.
***
Ben finished a song for Loch this morning. Loch was singing really quietly but then he started coughing like crazy so Ben picked it up and sang it softly to the end. Then he told Lochlan it was amazing how the stronger he gets the weaker Loch gets and is it a ploy to get more of my attention? The sarcastic Scot came out swinging, telling Ben he can get my attention without any effort and that if Ben thinks he would risk his life for a little more quiet time with the girl then, well, he can go to hell.
Oh dear.
I warned Loch softly in gaelic to stop. Just a couple of words and Ben came rushing across the room asking me what it means. What did I say? Are we going to leave him on the outside forever or just when it's truly important?
It made me want to cry to see him like this.
But I didn't cry. I taught him the words once taught to me and then I left them there together. They can sort this out. They can figure out where they stand with each other because they both know where they stand with me.
***
Jake asks if I know who left the package.
Go away, I tell him. You're not real and I'm crazy and I don't want to talk in case Joel hears me.
Joel is working. We have the place to ourselves. He sprawls out on the floor across from me. He's all long legs and seventies wavy hair. His grin slows my heartbeat down to a flat line. I don't want to die under a drill press. I may not have a say.
I'm as real as you need me to be, Bridget.
I need you to not be anything so I can get better. Please go away.
When you're done needing me, you'll let me know and then you'll let me go.
What if that never happens?
I don't know, Bridget. What comic book is that?
The Starman Omnibus.
Ah. Lochlan's fictional alter ego.
Richard Swift. This has nothing to do with Lochlan.
Oh right. Accent. Top hat. Magical powers. Not a villain but not a hero either. Seems about right.
Wow. You guys really have it in for him lately. Can you cut him some slack please? He almost died last week.
I succeeded in that. Do I get slack?
Not a chance.
See? Loch is the lucky one. Your loyalties are ironclad.
To my boys. Including you.
The hierachy with him at the top.
So?
You admit it?
I don't know what you want from me today, Jake.
I wanted to know if you knew who left you the care package. Because it wasn't the magical fire thrower looking out for your best interests this time.
Then tell me who it was.
It was Henry. Now you'd better start pulling your shit together a little better than this, Princess, because you have to be the parent he needs. Don't let the Devil turn that beautiful child into a mirror of himself. Because that child wishes out loud to God that a miracle somehow makes him Loch's child so that he and Ruth can match and so you and Caleb won't have to fight anymore.
