I'm so tired today I feel slow and drugged, I probably am drugged, it would be one way to keep me in the big bed upstairs and not out on the chilled bricks leading to the boathouse. Lochlan isn't mad, he just keeps his undercurrent of frustration with him at all times, a steady drone that hurts my ears if I pay too much attention to it.
(I don't know, Jesus. Sometimes I think I should just sell out and show you my fucking Outfit of the Day or talk about mindfulness or paint swatches or cooking for the week for a large family but no, I won't. That isn't what this is.)
I told him I loved him until my face hurt and my lips were blue from the effort and the cold and the drone finally quieted down to a dull hum.
He ran his fingers across my cheek and smiled today and suggested we stay in and watch television. I have heard rumors that season 4 of American Horror Story visits the circus and my heart did a double flip-flop of excitement but since it is unconfirmed I will happily continue on with Asylum (season 2). Love this show, it's all strangeness and horror and inexplicably and over-the-top ridiculousness.
Just like you, he says.
Yeah, just like me.
(For the record the outfit was old jeans and a new Lucky Brand Triumph motocycles tee. Not worthy of a blog post but I've seen those OOTD blog posts and some of them aren't putting any more effort into it than I did, just so you know.)
(PS: Duncan joined AA. Not sure what that means yet. I'll talk to him tonight. Apparently he's been nothing but a lit arsehole since he got off the plane. Which is not good for him because he is the sweetest, most laid-back man you will ever meet. Maybe we really do take turns falling apart.)
(PSS: Henry and Caleb have an amazingly bad case of strep. Which is so horrible. Both are on penicillin and aspirins and cold cloths and juice around the clock and I want to cry at this point, really I do. It's been a while since Henry was this sick and PJ is keeping care of the devil because I'm not allowed.)
