Tuesday 23 November 2021

Glitter scavengers.

We had a bit of a fight last evening and Lochlan didn't come up last night. It might have been about my ear or about a second night with Caleb so he disappeared and Ben took over babysitting duties and I fell asleep curled around Lochlan's pillow, not sleeping at all after an hour or so because the bed was cold and Ben was out-cold and non responsive and I wish I could sleep like he does. I really do. 

I eventually fell asleep after leaving him twenty messages that he read and did not reply to. I don't remember falling asleep, I remember texting at four or maybe it was five in the morning and then when I woke up there was a little wooden box on the bedside table on top of my phone. 

(When I was little Lochlan used to make these all the time for me out of things he would find. Little treasures along the way. He said it was an offering to the magpie in me. The girl who loves soft things and things that shine.)

Inside was a dried tiny rosebud. Some shells. Sea glass. Chips of tiny gemstones. A tiny pinecone and a tiny acorn. A perfectly round white opal marble. A dried starfish baby. A garden quartz point wrapped in a bit of sterling wire. Some bleached bird bones. A pretty pink glass bead and an iron skeleton key. A small bit of green velvet ribbon and a carved wooden heart that he made (he's always making pocket hearts), stained with a turquoise-blue diluted milk paint. Glitter. 

(Always glitter.)

I was so enamored with my tiny fairy treasure haul that I carried it around all morning, marvelling at all of the little things he found and included. I even brought it outside with my coffee to have under the glass pergola in the rain this morning, staring intently at the way the change in light made different pieces glow.

And did not notice the patio heater base sitting directly in front of me and wiped out.

The coffee flew, splatting on the stamped cement floor of the patio, running dry into the design in rivers of wasted caffeine and shattered ceramic. The box flew and smashed against the hard cement too, stones flying everywhere. 

I fell and banged my head really hard. Stars and birds in a rainbow aura flew up immediately and I shook my head, feeling instant throbbing. 

Duncan (great) runs out. Hey! Shit. Sorry. I should have moved that. He is picking me up, pulling me to my feet. I am dizzy and uncentered and really upset about the little box. The coffee mug was bespoke too but I can probably commission a replacement. 

Lochlan comes out, worried and yelling (because that's how you know he's concerned, he becomes almost aggressive, unchecked panic and in charge all at the same time). I am in tears and I tell him the box broke and everything is everywhere. Duncan has the pieces of the cup, and Lochlan tells me just to sit on the floor while he finds the pieces. 

How will you know that you've found everything? 

There were fifty things in the box. It's always fifty. And I can grab another box. I have a crate full of them in the closet in the downstairs hall. I'm just glad you're not hurt. 

I have another concussion. I made sure to fall whole-body and not try to catch myself. I'm so talented it worked and my back and shoulder hurt along with my head. I crashed into the wrong iron bench and table. And the four chairs stacked behind the bench. Ha. Go big or go home, I guess. I should have gone big because I am home.

Lochlan hands me back the two halves of the box, filled with my treasures. George grabs it eagerly. George is so happy I put him first and he laughs with delight that our fairy treasures are intact. I'm just happy he is intact.