Batman's office in London is up at running at last! And he finally gave up on his efforts to secure a personal assistant there and so he changed his mind entirely and modified his plans significantly.
(this upset Caleb and just about everyone else. I'm kinda thrilled though, truth be told. And I rarely tell it so it must be special).
Instead of one imported assistant, he's fashioning the job into something for three people.
Me, New Jake and Asher.
Remember Asher? Batman gave him to me as a gift one Christmas, so that I would have my very own hot young butler except that Asher was outrunning his own problems and no one wanted a stranger in the house even though he is one of Batman's relatives.
But he'll be at Batman's. And he will function as butler there. Head of household, cooking, errands, organizing cleaning staff, drivers, deliveries and social functions, which is funny because Batman hardly ever entertains. He is one third.
The second third is New Jake, who will function as security and general maintenance/landscaping/vehicles/outside everything. But who gets a sparkling raise and odd complete veto powers over Asher because Asher's a tiny bit flighty so we're going to watch him grow into this position. Both of them, maybe.
The third-third is me, though the extent of my duty will be part-time (maximum ten hours a week. I can do ten hours a week) coordination of lawyers, accountants and temps to deal with all the things I today refused to do, sliding down off the chair from where I sat listening, with a rather dramatic and childish whine of despair and Batman laughed at my actions, pulling the 'coordinator' idea out of thin air, on the spot.
I can do that. I climbed back up into my seat and straightened my sweater, smiling like nothing happened.
On one condition.
What is that?
You have to spend the money I pay you instead of hording it, and no fraternizing with the other employees.
When have I ever fraternized with Jasper?
It isn't Jasper I'm thinking of.
Asher's a little young for my tastes unless you want me to go full coug-
Hey. Jake and I are adults and we got it out of our systems. I think.
Keep it professional.
You're SO boring.
For Christ's sake, I'm kidding.
But you're not and you have zero shame.
I give zero fucks, there is a difference. I'm always vaguely ashamed, if you want the truth.
Then why don't you change that?
Look at him. Would you?
Probably not. But I'm also not his type.
Lucky for me then.